


Youth

by downpourcity



Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-14
Updated: 2018-08-02
Packaged: 2019-05-07 02:19:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14661321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/downpourcity/pseuds/downpourcity
Summary: A complete re-write of the Life is Strange Chloe, Max and Rachel, saga. Follow Max Caulfield and Chloe Price from Farewell to Life is Strange 1 in an entirely re-imagined way.





	1. Fare-thee-well

Max Caulfield rest her hands against the banister of her friend’s home, staring down with a huge smile on her face at William Price. Chloe stood next to her, bumping into her occasionally, in a childish manner.

“Alright girls, I’m going to go. I’ll be back home closer to dinner,” He squint at them, smirking mischievously, “And girls? Stay out of trouble.”

“Yes dad!” Chloe stuck out her tongue, shutting her eyes tight while waving at him.

“Oh, and Chloe? Your mom wants your room to be clean by the time we come back. Put it into tip top shape, Captain Bluebeard!” He made a hook with his finger, closing one eye.

Chloe smiled, giggling at his nickname for her. “Alright, scally-dad, I’ll swab the deck.” She managed to mirror his pirate look.

Max waved timidly, smiling widely. “See you later!”

He blew a joking kiss at them, his facial features beaming.

William turned around, jingling his keys in his hand. He opened the door and closed it. The thud was light hearted and swift.

“Okay Maximillian, here’s the deal.” An impish grin on the blonde replaced the previously childish one.

“What’s the plan for today?” Max grew giddy, extraordinarily excited to make today one of the most memorable.

“So, mom and dad want me to clean my room, and…” She rolled her eyes, and in a mocking tone said, “Stay out of trouble. Soooo what if we clean my room aaaand have fun doing it?”  
  
“Is that even possible?” Max stuck out her tongue in disgust, shivering theatrically.

Chloe ran to her room just behind them, sliding on her wood floor towards the wall. “Are you coming Max?”

Max ran after, sliding, hitting the wall and then saving herself by doing a quick air-guitar.

“Good going! Look at you go!” Chloe shot finger-guns at her, giggling.

“So, what are we doing?” She put on a board face, slumping over.

“Blowing my unwanted stuff into smithereens!” Chloe threw up the horns, bobbing her head up and down.

“Blowing stuff up?” Max grew suspicious of this plan, hoping that they wouldn’t manage to burn the house down somehow.

“Yup yup! I have some left over firecrackers from the fourth of July, we can use those and the lighter my dad keeps downstairs near the door.” She rubbed her hands together, gradually scooting clothing and other items obstructing the center of the room with her foot. “We’ll use this as the launch pad.”

“That doesn’t seem like a great idea…At least in here.” Max paled, thinking about all the ways the firecrackers could blow through the floor or set off the fire alarm or- or-

“It’s not even enough of an explosion to hurt anything.” Chloe shrugged, walking quickly to her door. “I’m gonna get the lighter, you find something to blow up!”

Max nodded, looking around the messy room for something to erm, blow up. She grabbed a handful of mangled dolls and set them in the center of the room, at least they’d blow up something cool. She sat on the edge of Chloe’s bed, staring at the center of the floor. She sighed, wishing she didn’t have to leave in the coming days. She had already told Chloe at this point and she had seemed to be taking it just fine. She hoped it would stay that way.

“Where did he put it?!” Chloe’s voice echoed up from downstairs. “Dammit!” A bunch of rustling and a muffled meow came upstairs. “C’mon kitty, I’ll take you instead.” A very high pitched lovey-dovey voice followed the hot-headed temper.

Max nervously moved her leg up and down. A grey and white cat ran into the room hopping onto Max’s lap, slapping her in the face with his tail. He meowed in a sarcastic manner, whipping her in the face again.

“Hello to you too, Bongo.” Max pet him behind the ears, he nuzzled into her hand, purring loudly.

“I couldn’t find the lighter, so I found the next best thing.” Chloe said as she finally came up the stairs. “Pogo the pirate cat!”

“We aren’t cleaning your room are we…” Max cocked her head, feeling the cat move upward to rub his head into her neck.

“Nope! Since you’re leaving in a few days I’m not going to boooore you with room cleaning. No! I gotta give you a Chloe Price special.” She walked over to her book case, trying to find something. “Where did I put it…”  

Max peered over Bongo’s fluff, he jumped off her lap, crawling over the other end of her bed nearest the window. He spread out, bathing in the sun.

“Where did I put that treasure map?” She went through more and more before groaning out, “Are you kidding me?”

“Well I remember you saying that you wanted to hide it because then it wouldn’t be much of a treasure hunt if you didn’t have to work for it.” Max shrugged, sliding onto the wood floor to sit next to Chloe cross-legged.

“But where would past me hide it?” Chloe began taking books off the shelf, looking behind them “Oh snap!”  
  
“Did you find something?” Max got excited, looking over in her direction quickly.

“Nope just some dust bunnies.” Chloe laughed sarcastically, frowning. “Check over there, maybe you’ll find something. That’s where I put all of my school shit from years ago.”

“You still kee-“Max paused, nodding to herself. Sentimental things always lingered in every nook and cranny of her room. It’s one of the things that made Chloe so cool. “Right.”

The brunette walked over near the closet, poking through the stack of papers and textbooks. One caught her eye on her look through. An old social studies handout with a few cute drawings and Chloe’s meticulous handwriting. She smiled wide, admiring her friend’s penmanship. “Oh Chloe…”

With prying eyes, she continued down the same portion of the stack, not finding a single hint as to where this map was. She came across an old history textbook with something barely sticking out from it but was distracted when Chloe let out an excited yell.

“Aha!” She shook a cassette tape at her once Max turned around. “Maybe this’ll help us. I honestly can’t remember what eight-year-old me said.”

“That’s crazy…. I can vaguely remember recording this.” Max walked over, watching as she grabbed out the cassette tape player.

Bongo stretched, letting out a silent yawn. He then plopped down beside the girls, watching the cassette tape player be set on the floor. He was transfixed by it. Allured.

A quiet snap, a click and then the audio began to play. “Avast, future wayfarer! Ye have uncovered the audio log of the most fearsome pirates in the Bays of Arcadia!”

Max snorted, smiling up at Chloe who was looking as excited as ever.

“Captain Bluebeard and Long Max Silver!”

The pair laughed, the recording continuing for quite some time until they began to talk about the buried treasure.

“So, yet in search of buried treasure, are ye? Well if it’s treasure you seek—” The pair leaned in, pulling back in laughter at their reaction.

A quieter hushed voice filled the recording, William’s voice. Chloe’s facial expression softened. When the recording ended a warmness had filled the room. Bongo meowed breaking the silence. The mixed feelings of both sudden realization of Max leaving and that of all the times they spent together filled their hearts and chests. A heaviness brought the room down.

“Let’s find that treasure.” Chloe was spontaneous when she wasn’t feeling great. “So first… we have to find…the manuscripts. I think I know what eight-year-old me meant.” She turned around, grabbing something from the bookcase, another old sketchbook.

“Aww Chloe, our old sketchbook! That’s where we kept all of our pirate drawings.” Max melted at the sight. “Maybe the map will be in there!” She flipped through many pages, stopping on the ones with pictures taped inside. Pogo the pirate… Captain Bluebeard, and Long Max Silver. They were all so cute dressed up like that. She reached a ripped-out page, looking on in despair. “It looks like a page was ripped out, I wonder if it’s the map?”

“Hmm probably, go check around again.” Chloe turned back around to the bookcase where the sketchbook was, prying through book by book in a meticulous fashion.

Max had a hunch she knew precisely where it was. The history textbook she had missed. She remembered something sticking out of it. She quickly walked over, running her finger over the pages until she hit one with her fingernail that stuck out. She pulled it out, and there it was. The map. She held it up, looking it over. “Bingo!”

An amulet, a vastly large tower, a pirate ship, a telescope and a castle.

Woah, they had hidden the amulet where? She had remembered it being in the attic. She squinted, realizing that part of the map had been revised with a sticky note.

“Do you remember moving the amulet, Chloe?” Max looked under the sticky note, finding the cavern she remembered.

“Yeah, we moved it because mom and dad said the attic wasn’t safe enough for it anymore.” She shrugged, “So we moved it somewhere even better.”

“The lighthouse?” Max questioned, cocking her head to the side.

“No silly! Our old treehouse.” Chloe nudged her. “Let’s go! We’ll have to be back before supper so we can convince them we spent time cleaning, but I know we’ll make it in time.”

Max nodded excitedly, remembering the old treehouse sitting in the woods up behind Chloe’s house. The pair ran down the stairs, going out the garage door. Chloe grabbed her skateboard and prompted Max to grab her old scooter. “C’mon let’s go!”

“Okay okay!” Max grabbed her helmet off a shelf, putting it on her head as quickly as possible. She grabbed the well-loved scooter.

Chloe opened the garage door, sliding out with her skateboard. Then she closed it once Max was out. “Okay Long Max Silver, let’s shred the roads.”

Max clipped the helmet’s straps together, steadying herself on the scooter. “Race you!”

“You’re on!”  Chloe shot forward, propelling herself up the hill with ease. She darted up the streets towards the forest, Max following just barely behind. They dodged a few rare cars, a cat or two and then a seagull who was eating on the side of the road.

“Onwards and upwards!” Chloe yelled back, jumping over a bump in the road and then landing back down onto the ground almost biting it. _She really needed to perfect that._

Max stopped, Chloe did too.

“You okay, girl?” Max’s voice grew worried.

“I’m good, let’s take the rest on foot. I heard the hike is good this time of year.” Chloe made sure to sound as snooty as possible to block out the obvious fear in her voice of almost slipping up.

They walked into the forest on one of the many pine needle ridden paths. Chloe kicked up some dirt on the way. “It’s so nice back here.”

“I remember sleeping up in the tree during the hottest days of the summer.” Max sounded dreamy, smiling up at the light peeking through the trees up above.

“C’mon Long Max Silver! No time to waste. Just a little further.” Chloe ran ahead, stopping to a complete halt near another person.

A small girl sat on a log next to her bike, she was reading a thick book titled “A Midsummer Night's Dream”.

Chloe gawked at her as she looked up from her book at their loudness. “I didn’t know anyone else came out here.”

The girl smiled thoughtfully, putting her book down into her lap. “Hey.”

“Hi! I’m Chloe.” Chloe smiled from ear to ear, “I see you around sometimes but I never got your name!” She knew she was popular with the historically popular kids of Arcadia but she never really got to meet her. It was like she was untouchable, well until now.

“I’m Rachel.” She blushed, leaning back to look up at the sunrays coming through the pine trees. Her hair shined in the light.

“Nice to meet you Rachel, I’m Max.” Max entered the conversation, waving at her awkwardly.

“I hope we didn’t interrupt.” Chloe thoughtfully added.  

“No, it’s fine. You just reminded me I needed to go home anyway. I have some homework I need to finish up.” The girl stood up, her strawberry blonde hair falling gracefully to her shoulders.

“So soon?” Chloe teased, nudging Max.

“Maybe we can talk later! I’ll probably come back to this spot again tomorrow!” Rachel put her book into a bag and then propped up her bike. “Bye Chloe, Max…” She smiled in a huge way, waving excitedly. “Argggh” She jokingly said, hearing them talking like pirates from the time they had entered the forest. She got up on her mountain bike and road away back down towards the street.

“She seems fun.” Chloe thought aloud, watching as she raced away.

“Isn’t she that one kid that just moved here from Long Beach but hangs out with the Prescott family?” Max quietly asked, looking back towards Chloe.

“Yeah, I think so.” Chloe nodded, walking back towards the direction of the tree house.

Max followed, the pair walking to the old wooden structure in the tree. Chloe began her way up the ladder, standing on the floor. “Are you coming?”  
  
The brunette nodded, going up the ladder. When they entered there wasn’t an amulet in sight! She looked around the small house, finding nothing but two plastic chairs. Chloe sat down, setting her skateboard in front of her, using it to prop up her feet a little bit.  
  
“Maybe some squirrels stole it?” Chloe said in a tired voice, leaning back.

“Maybe.” Max looked around, eyes resting on the leg of one of the plastic chairs. “Wait.”

She grabbed the unoccupied chair, turning it over. The amulet was taped by duct tape on the bottom of the chair. “Smart.”

Max pried it off, holding it up in the air. “You ready to find the telescope and the treasure?”

Chloe nodded, smirking as she stood back up, almost falling over because of the skateboard she forgot in front of her. “Man, I’m not doing well today.”

The two went down the ladder and ran off down the hill. One after another. Then it was a race against time. Well, or so they made it out to be.

Once they made it back home they had thrown their things back into the places they were, almost perfectly to “fool” whoever came in later. Then as they came through the door and back into the house they ran into one another.

“To the pirate ship!” Chloe declared, sticking up a finger as she ran full bore towards the sliding glass door. She opened it with one swift motion.

“Argh!” Max yelled back, shutting the door after Chloe and running to the swing set.

The blue-bearded pirate looked around the garden, finding the telescope. Hidden in a flower pot. “How’d it end up in here?”

Max shrugged, running over with the amulet. Chloe assumed position on their pirate ship, smirking with one eye closed. “And who are ye?”

“Long Max Silver, first mate, permission to board cappin’?” She threw on her best pirate accent.

Chloe giggled, stepping down from the ship, letting Max up. “Permission granted.” She bowed.  
  
“So Captain Bluebeard, how do we put this together?” She questioned, holding the two objects down to her.  
  
Chloe held up the ‘amulet’ to the sky, looking through it to reveal a map. “We just need some tape.”

Max nodded, stepping down the ladder. “Do you know where tape would be?”

“Probably over by dad’s paint.” She pointed to the corner of the house.

Max sprinted over, finding the painters tape she mentioned. She ran back over with the tape, remembering to find the right direction of the amulet first before taping it. She held two pieces of history in her hands. She remembered doing this years ago with her a long while ago. Her heart sunk, she’d be leaving in a few days. She’d miss Arcadia Bay… and most of all, Chloe Elizabeth Price.

She returned to Chloe, getting back up the ladder. She held up the two objects, twisting and turning it for what felt like ever. “Almoooost…”

“Are you seeing it?” Chloe asked excitedly, not even remembering what they buried.

“I am!” Max taped the two pieces together, the treasure lined up. “Oh there it is!”

Chloe ran out to the yard, standing near the fence. “Where?”

“Go straight forward.” Max flipped her hand through the air, ushering her forward. “Almost, almost…just a little to the left… annnnnnd there!”

Max ran down the latter, grabbing a garden trowel from the side of the house. She joined Chloe and they began to dig.

“Oh snap! I see metal!” Chloe rubbed away the dirt to reveal a large metal container. “Oh I don’t remember burying that.”

It took them ages to finally get out the metal container. But once they did they were met with nostalgia. Taking it inside, setting it in the front room and sitting on the carpet with Bongo was… _wonderful._ She pried the top off, and inside was a bunch of items. Things from pirate memorabilia to notes from William and a few cassette tapes. Chloe smiled at all of them, feeling the sadness finally hit her as their pirate journeys came to an end with the opening of this capsule.

“You’re really leaving, huh?” Chloe asked, looking up from one of the many drawings they did together as kids.

“…I… uh.. yeah.” Max fidgeted with her hands, staring at the carpet. “I don’t want to Chloe, you know that.”

“I know, Max. I just—I hope you keep in contact with me. Pen pals. _Best pen pals_.” Chloe’s voice hung heavy.

“Best pen pals forever. I’ll come and visit though!” She attempted to convince herself of that, wanting to deflate into nothingness or root herself into the floor so she could stay in Arcadia.

The front door opened in a forceful tired fashion, Joyce walked in first along with William. “Hi girls! We’re home. I hope you are ready for some good home cooking, Max!”

Max blinked out a weird feeling that shook her, she attempted to throw it off of her.

“Hi Joyce, William, welcome back!” It was hard to smile for her but she managed. A sick feeling sunk into her stomach as reality kicked her. She’d miss out on times like this. The times where they she stayed over and ate dinner with them, shared a bed with Chloe and Bongo, brushed her teeth with her… no, did everything with Chloe. They were best friends and had bonded through so many experiences. Why did her dad have to take that job in Seattle? Why did her mom agree? Why didn’t they just stay in Oregon?

After a dinner, a long joking discussion about not cleaning Chloe’s room and a good night’s rest… Max was stuck in an unfortunate position. She had to leave at noon. Just up and go. She lay in bed next to Chloe, staring up at the ceiling with hazy eyes.

Morning sunlight drifted into the window behind them, bathing the bed in orange light. She’d stay with Chloe until then. She’d be right there with her until she left.

“Max… this totally sucks.” Chloe let out a yawn, leaning back into her pillows.

“I know…” The brunette groaned, putting a hand over her eyes to hide the tears that pried at the corners of her eyes.

“We’ll make the best of today, I know it.” After the pirate had spoken those words, the day had been on fast forward, not caring a moment for their precious time. It was as if time itself had forsaken them.

The beautiful friendship duo were hugging one another in the hallway of the Price home, not wanting to each other go.   

“Chloe… I don’t wanna go.” She sobbed, clutching the blonde close.

“Please don’t go Max… please stay with me.” Chloe sobbed back, trying her hardest to hold her tears back.

“Alright… I don’t want to break you two apart, but we need to head out, Max.” Ryan Caulfield’s voice came from outside as he walked up to the door.

“Please keep in touch, Max. _Please._ ” Chloe let her go hesitantly, letting the dams break. Tears streamed down her face in waves.

“Always, Chloe. _Always_.”

With those words the brunette and blonde were separated and going in two separate directions. After making it to Seattle that evening, Max realized she had had several missed calls from Chloe about William who had gone off to retrieve Joyce from the store. She remembered his goodbye as he left and his well-wishes. He had wanted Chloe and Max’s sendoff to be between them. Special.

The calls and texts were frantic, charged, full of sadness and anger and outrage and destruction.

 _“Max… Max he’s gone… he’s.. he’s dead…please come back Max please I need you so badly..."_  
  
"You told me you'd... you'd keep in touch."  
  
"Max please please call me back when you hear this"  
  
"Max? MAX?! ARE YOU EVEN GETTING MY CALLS OR TEXTS?!"  
  
"Max Caulfield... please..."

Max stared at the phone with a blank face, feeling her stomach grow sick again, charged with fear and confusion. William was gone? She didn't know how to throw a response together to this. She picked up her phone, dialing the number she had memorized by now. She let it ring and ring and ring and ring, until finally it hit the message. "Price residence, leave your name and number and we'll get back to you after the beep!" _Beep._

"Chloe I'm... so sorry I had to leave at such a bad time. I'm sorry I didn't get your calls right away. My phone died while we were on the highway. I can't even fathom what just.. happened." Her voice broke off, tears streaming down her face. "I'm so sorry I left Arcadia... I'm so sorry he's gone-- I.. I... I don't know what to do and I feel so bad and I--" She kept talking, not noticing the electronic voice telling her that the mailbox was full so her message was cut off. 

"I love you Chloe Price, you're my best friend and I...." A click and then a final warning message of depleted memory.  She hung up her phone, sobbing at this point into her hands, dropping her phone to the ground in anger. _Why was life so unfair?_    
  
Life could go into a rhythm and when one beat was out of place? The rhythm would dissolve into a cacophony of sounds, spreading it's clutches onto whomever it decided to just to make the rhythm "right" again. William Price died while driving to meet his wife, getting hit by a truck that's breaks let out by sheer chance. 

Why _was_ life so unfair? Was it ever fair to begin with?


	2. Punk is Dead

Chloe Price sat in her room, staring blankly up at the ceiling. Her long blonde hair caught beneath her back. The house was silent, her mother was out working. It had been a long and hard year alone. Blackwell, the place to comb her ego and bring her up in the world had failed her. They called her a bully, an outcast, a predator to all that was orderly. _She hated it._ She wondered why she even kept going. So, she lay in her room on the afternoon of a long day there, holding a pack of her late father’s cigarettes in her hand.

Her phone vibrated beneath her, she sat up, grabbing it in her free hand.

_Max Caulfield._

She rolled her eyes, sighing into the air. They had gotten into an argument the night before via text, Max had refused to call her.

“What.” She picked it up, grumbling into the worn frame of her phone.

“Chloe I’m sorry for last night.” She hurriedly said, huffing and puffing into the mouth piece.

“Are you calling me while you’re—” Anger filled her voice.

“I’m biking to my dad’s house.” Max sighed, feeling the pull of these two worlds colliding against her.

“He doesn’t pick you up? Lame.” Chloe tried for a calmer approach this time, the anger would get her nowhere.

“He’s too busy working on building schematics to leave work for me on time.” She groaned, almost falling off her bike as she came to an abrupt stop which was obvious on both ends. Her bike breaks groaned out in protest, and a yell came from a driver. “Sorry!”

“Get off your damn phone!” The driver yelled, breaks squealing, pushing past the speed limit to prove his “point.”

“Max!” Chloe shouted, nearly tossing her phone out of her hand.  

“People are so shitty here.” Max grumbled, voice shaking, remembering her friends talking about the Seattle chill.

“Then can’t you and your mom move back here?” Chloe asked hopefully.

“She thinks dad will take her back.” The sounds of her getting off her bike and walking onto the sidewalk entered her ear.

“Apology accepted by the way. We both have it shitty right now.” Chloe cracked her neck, shifting her grip on the pack of cigs.

“I have to go. I don’t want to chance another run in. Text ya later?” Max asked in a voice devoid of emotion, sadness taking a toll on her entire life.

“Max, I—Okay. Text you later, alligator.” She moved a piece of blonde hair from her face, sighing as she hung up and sat her phone down next to her onto the slightly made bed.

Chloe sat didn’t bother sitting up, clutching the pack of cigs closer in her hand. She carefully guided them up in front of her, staring at the pristine nature of the package. The pack was full other than one missing. The last cigarette her father had smoked before leaving to get her mother.

William.

Chloe sat up hearing a chair creak upstairs with her. Her mother must’ve returned home before she had realized it. She swiped a piece of her blonde hair from her eye, slipping the pack of cigs beneath her pillow. She got up, opening her door and sliding out. She crept into the hall, carefully meandering towards her bedroom. Joyce sat in front of a computer screen, visibly biting her lip in anxiety. A picture of a man sat on the screen next to an open IM window.

Anger boiled in her chest as she felt betrayal rush towards her lips. Outbursts were so common for her now.

In a single, determined and destroyed whisper she hissed, “Motherfucker.”

She vanished before the repercussions could be brought down upon her. With each step back to her room which was merely feet away from her mother’s space, she felt herself gaining fire. First Max, then her dad, and now her mom was looking for someone to date to fill the space of her father. No one could fill that space, no one was nearly eligible enough to do so.

She couldn’t text her best friend, and her “friends” were all off elsewhere for the night. The dark-blonde was trapped in her own home, alone to herself and destined for tragedy wherever she went. Or so that was how it seemed.

Chloe slammed the door shut, putting a chair beneath the doorknob to prevent it from opening. She could hear footsteps approaching the door.

“Chloe.” Came her mother’s voice, firm. “Please.”

She slid down the wall onto the wooden floor into a pile of half clean clothing. Her head hit the wall with a thunk.

“Please what?” She threw back, pain obvious in her words.

“Don’t be like this…” Joyce paused, Chloe visualized her head bowing. “Please. Don’t do this to me again.”

An offended noise came from Chloe.

“I don’t want to find you in your room … _like last time_.” A heavy sigh came from her, obvious fragments coming from her voice. She was crying. Again. “I just wanted to find someone to help me heal. To help me find myself again… I can’t deal with this anymore, Chloe. I can’t deal with this anymore than you can.”

“But I’m not going off finding another person to replace dad!” Chloe slammed her fist down, hating to hear her mom cry, but hating to know her dad would be just a memory. “It’s only been a year.” Chloe’s voice cracked finally, tears collecting in her eyes.

“Chloe please come out. Please.” Joyce’s voice degraded further, her hand resting against the wall outside her door. She grabbed the door with her free hand, jiggling the knob.

“Why should I?” She shot back, putting her head in her knees. “I’ll open that door and dad’ll still be gone and you’ll have a stranger in the house.”

“Honey please!” Anger laced her sadness now.

Chloe stood up, groaning. She felt dizzy, exhausted and fake. An existential crisis brewed within her soul. Who the hell was she anymore? How did she end up in this place? This alternate dimensional pocket that was out to get her? She looked around her room for any form of help besides going straight for her door. She felt knots well up in her stomach and gut, bringing her to lean on the wall just inches from her door. She knocked a fist to the wall weakly, closing her eyes. Maybe if she opened them up again she’d be back with Max, back with her dad, back with… normal.

She counted to three, taking a deep breath. She let it out, opening her eyes. She looked around the room, finding herself stuck in this reality. She bit her lip, sliding the chair from out under the doorknob. She hated this reality. Why couldn’t things be any easier? She succumbed to her mother’s wishes, opening the door just a hair. The shorter woman was hooped over, looking more worse for wear than ever.

Joyce’s first instinct was to grab Chloe’s wrists, checking them and then bringing her in for a hug. “Thank, God.”

“You removed everything sharp from my room, remember?” Chloe replied in a muffled voice, trying to mask the heartbreak and confusion in her voice. She sighed, attempting desperately to keep up the annoyed physique as if the voice she had had behind the door was faked. Maybe then she’d convince herself she wasn’t upset. Plus, if she buried her emotions then maybe she wouldn’t feel at all. Then maybe everything at school, and at home would become easier. _No._

_Fuck no._

_Why would you intentionally go numb, Chloe Elizabeth Price? You would fall right into their playing hand. A card held hostage._

_No._

Joyce finally let go of her, the hug ending almost abruptly. They had hugged almost every day for a year. Every hug a tear felt one. It was becoming nauseating, _suffocating even._ An itch rifled through her body as she scratched at her wrist. She didn’t even feel comfortable in her own skin.

Who was Chloe Elizabeth Price?

After an awkward dinner, and a bittersweet talk about nothing out of the ordinary, the two went to sleep, taking the tension with them to their beds. Tomorrow was Friday, which meant if she could get through that, she’d have a weekend of pain and torture to herself.

That morning she got out of bed on time instead of late, trying a different approach to this painful existence. Maybe she’d write a book, call it the “Painful trials of Chloe Price and her losing battle.”  She laughed, stopping to look herself in the mirror before going out her door. She had to wear something dull and boring, something ordinary, just to not get noticed. Maybe today they’d leave her alone and feed on someone else’s obvious torment. Chloe went down the stairs, standing at the island near her mom’s usual spot.

“Morning.” She grunted.

“Morning.” Her mother looked down at a newspaper and some mail from the school. She drank out of a half-dirty white mug.

Chloe walked over, ignoring the depressing news article and going straight for the school newspaper that lay on the counter nearest to her.

_Rachel Amber Stars in Theatre Flop, Turns Theatre Flop into Lively Fish._

She rolled her eyes, grabbing a piece of toast as it popped out of the toaster. Maybe she could turn her floppy toast into a fish. That would beat half burnt toast and stale cereal. She didn’t even like fish, but it was better than this.

As she sat at the table her mind went back to the day she met Rachel. She had been sitting in the forest, reading a book the size of an encyclopedia, or at least she thought so, smiling really big.

She smirked at the thought of a younger version of her.

Rachel Amber Stars in Theatre Flop, Turns Theatre Flop into Lively _Goldfish._

She remembered her telling her they’d see each other again, but every time they met eyes in school she was given a mysterious smile and nothing more. It was as if she silently egged her on to come and talk with her, however she was always surrounded by her friends. Prescott the manipulative shy kid, Chase the Snooty Rich Child, and a few others that she didn’t keep pinged on in her mind all the time.

Then there were a few others, those she hated naming aloud in her head because even the mere thought of them hurt her heart. They all hated her and wanted her to suffer for being a kid on a scholarship. Just because she didn’t live in the dorms or do other snooty rich kid things didn’t mean a _damn_ thing.

“Alright, let’s go.” Joyce straightened her work shirt, trying to stand up straight.

“Do I have to?” She groaned in a slightly joking tone to pump herself up for the joke of a day she was about to have.

She followed her mother out to an extremely beaten up car. A used one they had bought months or so after his death. Joyce unlocked the door, scoot over, unlocked the passenger door and then sat back in the driver seat. Chloe got into the vehicle, sitting down in her usual spot. She wished she could crumpled into the seat and disappear elsewhere. Maybe into a world where Rachel Ambers’ smile had a more obvious meaning and a place where people wouldn’t bully her into submission. It took her multiple times to get the car to catch.

“C’mon now.” Joyce pat the car after getting it started finally. “Good girl.”

Chloe smiled in a quiet and respectful manner, enjoying the small moments before school for just a second. Then she got pulled back into the abyss that lurked in her mind and suffocated all good vibes to replace them with the bad ones.

She sat in stunned silence as they pulled up the hill towards the school. She hated how fast the depressed portion of her mind took over, possessing her fully until she was nothing but a one-track-minded zombie. Fear and anxiety pushed themselves on her like non-consenting scumbags. She wished she could tell them to go away, but without them she’d be even lonelier.

“I’ll see you later. Sorry I can’t drive you back home, sweetheart.” She put a hand on Chloe’s shoulder, smiling softly. “Now have a good day and don’t get into too much trouble.”

It wasn’t _her_ who got her into trouble. It was those idiots who never left her alone and accused her of hurting them. She got out of the car, moving a clump of her long hair behind her ear.

“See ya.” She waved back at her mom and turned around quickly, trying to recover from that so it didn’t come back to bite her later. Things even as small as being dropped off by her mother in a beat-up car got her into trouble with the students that tormented her. Any little thing to have an inch over her heart. Any little thing to cause her a little bit of upset during the day, was a victory for them.

She was ruthlessly tormented by people above her, and mostly by those in her year. It was as if she were caught in a bear trap she had set herself and the bears who were meant to be caught in it were tormenting her for her mistake. _Couldn’t they just kill her instead of watching her squirm?_   Chloe shoved that thought down immediately, remembering the thought of her mother asking her if she wanted counseling.

She could go to the counselor at school but he’d just make her feel like she was wasting his time. So, it was either school counseling, no counseling or just plain out eating burnt toast every morning until her mom made up the difference. Her stomach grabbed her, she groaned, feeling ill. She had to stop thinking about starving and start thinking about Science. Her first class of the day.

The tall prep shuffled into the main hall, quickly dodging all her normal beasts. She edged ever closer to her locker, stopping in her tracks, and then turning around. The sharks were hungry and all of them lurked in the water near her locker.  Maybe it was better if she didn’t get her books until the next class. Hopefully someone would share with her in Science.

Aggravation nagged at her stomach as she sheepishly avoided all eye-contact to get past the frenzy. Maybe they’d ignore her. Maybe she’d be free to get into class without a word in. Someone tugged on her hair. She attempted to ignore that, fire burning deep in her lungs.

“Excuse you!” Victoria hissed, putting out an _accidental_ foot. “Look at what you did.”

Chloe fell to the ground, catching herself before hitting her face into the tile floor. She looked up at the blonde whose books were conveniently scattered on the ground. She scanned the group of people, not once finding Rachel. Her heart sunk. The mysterious smiling girl wouldn’t be there to soften this. It was as if her charm had a way of taming Victoria Chase, leaving her quiet and semi-polite.

Instead of saying anything back she got up, feeling dizzy from the fall.

“ _C’mon trailer trash, pick up her books for her_.” A random jock said from the sidelines, his name and attitude unimportant enough to have a name stick out in her mind.

_Trailer trash. Heh. He wishes._

It was the first time she had been mocked vocally for being poor. Maybe she had had only a year’s subscription to “Feel Bad for Her Because She Lost Her Father”. However, she wouldn’t subscribe to that again.

“Fuck this.” Chloe hissed, looking at Victoria with wild eyes. “I’m done.”

She turned around, walking angrily through the double doors into the main hall. She nearly hit Rachel off her feet as she abruptly entered the bathroom.

“O-Oh I… _sorry.”_ Chloe’s voice melted into nothingness as she passed by Rachel who laughed warmly in her direction.

“Don’t worry about it.” The smaller blonde smiled back at her and then went to join her douchebag friends.

The taller female entered the empty bathroom, hearing the first bell ring. She groaned, feeling compelled to run to class, but the other half of her told her to run away from it. She scooped water into her hands from the sink, trying to cool her burning cheeks down.

Against all odds she returned to class after cooling off, convincing herself that this was what her father would’ve wanted for her. _Because even through extreme trials, there was success at the end._

Even after his death, he continued to appear in her mind, helping her through the motions or at least she liked to think he did. Maybe he watched her from high above, cheering her on like he used to.

Every afternoon she’d walk home alone down the narrow and winding country road, dodging cars like a game of chicken. She rounded the corner to her street, taking her time down the road and to the house. A completely foreign car sat in the driveway next to her mom’s beat up wagon. It was blue, bleak and completely non-descript.

The feeling from the night before and the feeling from school that morning bubbled in her chest, filling her lungs with fire. Anxiety and crushing fear threw itself at her like waves against a shoreline. She didn’t want to face it, but she had to, the curiosity was too loud in her mind.

Chloe rain her fingers down the door onto the knob, she turned it, opening the door to hear warm laughter from her mother. She hadn’t caught the eye of whoever joined her. A man, with an unfamiliar face sat opposite of her in the kitchen.

“Oh David, I hope she likes you.” Joyce’s voice was full of happiness, a foreign concept in this dreary home.

_David_. The man she had mentioned twice before. The man she saw on her mom’s computer. A patron to her place of work.  The “noble veteran”.

She shut the door behind her louder than she had wanted, catching the attention of both David and Joyce.

“Oh, hi honey.” Joyce smiled in her direction.

Chloe froze, staring at the both in both anger and fear.

“Hello Chloe.” David stood up, walking towards her.

Chloe un-thawed herself, running up the stairs and into the bathroom where she promptly locked herself in. It was the only door in the house that still had a lock other than the entry doors. Her mom couldn’t trust her with locks anymore. Not after—

“Chloe?” Joyce’s voice echoed up the stairwell.

_No answer._

The blonde put her hands on the counter, leaning forward to _really_ look at herself in the mirror.

Her skin was sickly pale, the bags under her eyes had bags, her cheeks were concave, her entire physique was getting worse. She didn’t even know who she was looking at in the mirror anymore. She closed her eyes, feeling heat exit her mouth as she exhaled, the fire within her lungs being freed.

“She’s upset because…” Joyce started, the man stopping her.

“I know why she’s upset. I’m sorry to have upset your daughter, Joyce.” His voice was somber.

“I hope she can heal with all of us together.” Joyce murmured loud enough for her to catch.

_All of us together._  
  


**_A l l  o f u s t o g e t h e r_ **

Without thinking she grabbed the scissors from the drawer, opening them and holding them close to her in a dangerous fashion.

**_Together._ **

She felt her hands shaking as a million thoughts raced through her brain at once. The sharp blades so close to her she could feel them. She silently screamed, trying to throw the thoughts away immediately, trying to silence them trying to—

“Chloe?” David’s voice was outside the door now.

**_ALL OF US TOGETHER_ **

Chloe began taking the scissors to her hair, chopping inches upon inches off, taking her bangs off, cutting it until it was shorter than it had ever been in her entire life. Once she was done she dropped the scissors to the ground with a metallic clink, falling to the ground in tears with them. The door handle was being jiggled and unlocked.

She sat in the middle of all her cut hair, sobbing her heart out.

Joyce and David were her spectators.

All of them, **_together._**


	3. Kicking the Door Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The following Chapter involves references to self-harm and suicide. Relief lines are listed at the bottom.
> 
> Update:   
> This chapter is short but the lengths will hopefully increase as we move forward.

Max stood in her room, sorting through pictures that she had recently taken around the city. She kept taking the shot, hoping to recapture her childhood home in time only to be met with the stark skyline that Seattle had to offer.

The weather took an abrupt change, water rushing against the window like a wave crashing against the beach. She could hear her mother sobbing from the other room. It was always like this at night. Her mother would retreat to the darkness of her room, fall to the floor in a heap and cry until she could no longer breathe.

Max sighed, creasing her brows, freezing herself in position in her room. Maybe tonight she’d run away. Maybe tonight she’d hop on a bus to Portland and then hobo it to Arcadia Bay.

The thought of her mother in a heap on the floor and leaving here there made her skin crawl. She loved her, but she made life hard. Heat built up in her throat in the form of bile, she swallowed it back with a choke. It made her knees weak to do something as cruel as leaving her mother here alone.

She kicked her bed, which gently scattered the polaroids around.

_He wouldn’t take her back. He had other plans. They were his stepping stones. His pawns in a chess game._

She fell to her knees, burying her face into the pictures their surfaces brushing her cheeks. Her phone vibrated from across the room, her chest clinched. It was probably Chloe. Nobody else texted the loner.

Max stood up calmly, scared to look at her phone.

_1 new message from Chloe_

Even thinking about Chloe made her feel even more alone because of the vastness of miles between the two of them. She dropped the phone, looking up at the popcorn ceiling in agony. She shakily grabbed it, looking at the notification with scared eyes.

_Max u there?_

The realization of not answering it being easier on her emotions dawned upon her. She set the phone back down, moved to her bed and lay down, looking away from the desk. The phone vibrated again, her chest tightened up more so. Nausea gripped at her being, sickening her to the point of closing her eyes and wishing her phone away.

Another message.

The messages grew less and less over time until not a single word hung in the air between the once inseparable pair. _Maybe, forgetting was easier. Maybe finalizing Seattle as her home was easier._

It grew into months of separation, a year… and then some.

Her phone rang for the first time in a long while. A voice mail was left. She grabbed her phone, not recognizing the number. With the tap of a finger she dared to listen to it.

“Hey, Max, forget about Chloe? You’re an absolute dickwad of a “friend”. You leave her hanging like that when she needed you the most? Now you don’t even answer your phone? Fuck you!”

Max froze at this message, feeling sweat beading up on her forehead. Who was that? She wasn’t confrontational. Well, usually. She dialed back the number, being greeted by that same voice from before.

“Wow, you actually called me back.” The sarcasm was thick in her voice, “You don’t even reply to my girl Chloe, but you call _me_ back. Huh interesting.”

“I think you have the wrong number.” Max sputtered out, feeling anger boil in her stomach.

“Chloe, was that her?” The voice asked back. “Good.”

Max felt panic grab her neck as she froze in place.

“Are you going to answer for your crimes?” The voice dramatically uttered in an appalled tone.

“I- “ Max couldn’t speak, her tongue becoming tied.

“You what?” The voice hissed.

“I…” Max said again, wooziness taking over.

“Speak!” The voice insisted.

Max hung up in fear, feeling her body shake from the anxiety that rattled through it. She felt her phone vibrate again in her hands. She threw the phone at the wall, it slid down onto the floor with a clatter.

_Another voicemail._

The brunette with freckles buried her face into her hands, trying desperately to duck and cover from the glowing screen of her phone against the darkness of the wood floor. Her frame rattled as she dared to get up, grabbing the phone anxiously, brushing her fingers across it to open up the voice mail. It began, this time a familiar voice rang out into the emptiness of her small bedroom.

“Max Caulfield! How dare you!”, The punk’s voice roared in pain, an edge of extreme sorrow etching into her soul. “You don’t talk to me when I need you the most, you leave me when I need you the most, your shitty father leaves you and your mom alone and all you can do is stay there in that hellhole of Seattle and you don’t even call me! You don’t even contact me you.. you….” Another voice, the voice from earlier came onto the phone in a cool and calming manner, “Chloe…. Chloe it’ll be okay… Don’t worry about her anymore, she’s not worth it.” Then a final sigh of sadness and then a click, the message was over.

The photographer was frozen in place on her bed, staring aimlessly at the curtains over her single bedroom window. _She’s not worth it… That’s right Max, I’m not worth it. I’m never worth anything. I should just find a hole and disappear. Chloe Price doesn’t care anymore. Chloe. Price. Doesn’t. Care. Anymore._

Thoughts bolted through her brain until she was exploding with massive doses of self-depreciation. So long ago she thought forgetting Chloe would help her heal and make her feel better but now? Knowing that Chloe had given up on her because of her actions? She wanted to run away until she couldn’t feel anything anymore. Why was she such a screw up? Why did her parents’ divorce like that? Why did she move away from Arcadia?

Anger built up until it was so overwhelming that she burst from her room and into the hall. She walked to her mother’s room, opening the door. Vanessa sat at her desk, staring down at her laptop with a quiet smile.

“Mom?” Max’s voice shook, her hands balled into fists. “Can I ask you something?”

“What is it honey?” Vanessa looked up, turning her full attention to her daughter.

“Can we… move back to Arcadia Bay?” She felt herself about to fall into tears at these words.

“You know we can’t leave Seattle…I just found good work here, and we’re saving up for you to go to Blackwell Academy next fall.” She frowned, shrugging.

“I…okay.” Max felt a crushing blow hit her entire being, her knees wanting to buckle. “Thanks.”

Vanessa stood up, noticing her wobble, “What’s wrong, hun?”

“Nothing… nothing’s wrong I’m okay. I just need to uh… lay down for a little bit.” Max turned away, walking to her room without another room. She collapsed onto the bed face first, screaming into the pillows.

She grabbed her phone, dialing Chloe’s number. **_The number you have reached is unavailable._**

Max pounded her fists into her pillows, feeling her anger seethe out around her. She dialed the other number, it began to ring. She heard it click, no hello, no anything, just a click.

“Chloe I’m… I’m so….” She let out a huge huff and then let it out, “I’M SUCH A FUCKING BITCH I’M SO SORRY CHLOE PRICE I’M SORRY I MESSED UP, I’M SORRY I LEFT I’M SORRY I STOPPED CONTACTING YOU I WAS SO SCARED TO TALK TO YOU I’M SUCH AN IDIOT—”

A sigh came from the other end, the other girl, who sounded like she was elsewhere now.

“Chloe’s asleep, dude. I’m glad I moved rooms before you started your screaming like a banshee into my ear.” The female sighed, a creak coming from her end from the stairs beneath her.

“W-Who… are you.” Max’s voice was mortified, embarrassed beyond belief, destroyed.

“Rachel.” The theatre child cooly said, laying back on the carpet, the stair beneath her feet as she stared at the ceiling.

“I’m sorry for yelling, Rachel.” Her voice caught in her throat.

“Dude, it’s fine.” Rachel laughed a little bit, attempting to calm the other down. “And I’m sorry for being so harsh, I just care for her a lot, you know?”

“And I’m sorry for not understanding how to speak.” Her cheeks heated, lips quivering again, she would cry again before long.

“Just… Max? Chloe’s had a long road here. Going silent on her made things worse for her. She felt alone. She felt…” Rachel sighed, looking towards Chloe’s door behind her head. “She almost left us.”

“Fuck… I…” Max felt the wind get knocked from her lungs.

“David moved in before long, sent her to some reformatory camp over the summer, she came back worse, he got her counseling, she came back more defiant… her mom and step-douche only told her she had problems. They didn’t even consider how she felt and still don’t. I stepped in and talked to them, David tried to tell me I was going over his boundaries. Joyce didn’t want to believe it… it’s just shit, Max. Shit.” Rachel heard the door creak, moving the phone away from her ear to reveal the ambient sounds of the almost silent house.

“Rach?” Chloe’s voice tiredly echoed.

“Yeah?” Rachel sat up, the stairs creaking again.

“Who are you talking to?” The bluenette yawned.

“Chloe, she’s sorry.” Rachel calmly said.

Chloe grabbed the phone forcibly from Rachel’s hand, jamming it to her ear.

“Chloe I…” She stuttered, feeling heat wash over her.

A breath entered her ear, she could almost feel the warmth.

“I’m sorry I left you when you needed me the most.” She paused, her heart aching. “I was scared.”

“Scared?” Chloe asked breathlessly in almost a laugh. “Why were you scared?”

“The anxiety it just… eats at you until you think stupid thoughts and just—” She was cut off almost immediately after that.

“Don’t tell me about anxiety like I don’t understand.” The coldness from her voice was enough to make one feel disregarded completely.

“Chloe please…” Max wanted so badly to embrace her best friend in the whole world, the one she turned her back on.

“No.” Chloe shook her head, biting at her lip. “No, I’m not going to be reeled in again and be crushed by you. Don’t ever call Rachel again.”

The phone call was dropped, the door was forcibly shut on her, she was alone once more.

The year that passed by went by like molasses since the last phone call between her and the punk. She was left facing dreams where she took a trip back to Arcadia, knocked on Chloe’s door and all was better and when she woke up it was all a farce.

She would torture herself by looking at Rachel’s social media pages, looking at the pictures she and Chloe took together. Chloe had changed so much it was sometimes hard to recognize her. Two years without Chloe Elizabeth Price were two years of pain and emptiness. The friends she had made in Seattle were flakes compared to the one she used to know and love. They’d give you smiles but then stab you in the back.

Max sat in the back of a car with a bunch of belongings, her father sat at the wheel, driving down the familiar stretch of HWY 101 towards Arcadia Bay.

Butterflies swirled around within her stomach, leaving her far away from the car and her head in the air. She’d return to Arcadia without a word to Chloe, afraid to ever run into her again.

When they entered the main stretch, she wanted to run away, but she couldn’t face it. She couldn’t breathe when they rounded the bend up the road towards the school, past Chloe’s street, and then up the mountain side. It looked the same but it felt different, it felt like nobody wanted her here and maybe that was for the best.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you ever have actively considered suicide or know someone who is hurting and needs help, please contact one of the following numbers:  
> For LGBT Youth: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/  
> US: 1-800-273-8255  
> Or refer to this link for international callers: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines
> 
> Update:  
> The next chapter will involve a flashback from Rachel's PoV.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm still writing August Rain, just taking a break by writing something different on the side.


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